LUSAKA MAN FINDS WIFE ON TOP OF MAN IN A LODGE, INJURES ANOTHER MARRIED WOMAN HEADING INTO NEXT ROOM
By Koswe Resident writer Yona Musukwa
Yesterday, we went to sign a police bond for the nephew of a colleague, who was arrested for assault.
Yesterday, the young man, we shall call him bo Peter, received classified information that his wife of four years, was seen in the company of her boss, heading towards a lodge in Kalundu.
Bo Peter has long been suspecting his wife of being generous with the private parts that are supposed to be his alone. His wife uses them as supporting documents for corporate upward mobility.
Peace loving members of the public and her workmates have been tipping bo Peter that his wife was donating the swollen computer mouse to her boss, making her boss bo Peter’s co-husband.
So when bo Peter received Intel yesterday that his wife was seen entering a fancy lodge in Kalundu, he sprang into action, rushed to the crime scene aka horizontal stadia, fully armed with a panga, with the intention of breaking the skull of his co-husband, in what we call in the Fossil Nation as conducting a head surgery without anaesthesia.
Bo Peter arrived at the named lodge, and carefully positioned himself so that he could catch them in the act. He patiently waited as his co-husband was doing a preamble aka marinating. Very constitutional.
As soon as bo Peter heard his wife start making horizontal soundtracks, he knew it was time to act. He entered the room using the massive glass windows. Indeed, he found his wife and his co-husband very engaged, horizontally.
Very naked, with his wife on top of her boss, riding him like she was competing for a horse racing world cup. Only a fool would think the two were discussing Zambia’s national reserves.
While bo Peter was busy getting shocked and angry, his co-husband hastily pulled out and did what bo John General did when he was caught ‘praying’ for a woman to conceive.
He pulled a muzala samukonga to safety, accelerating at 100 km per hour, as his nuclear warhead dangled from left to right.
Bo Peter tried to chase but his co-husband was too fast for him. It is at this point that bo Peter threw the panga at his running co-husband, with all his might, but sadly, it missed the head of his co-husband and hit someone else, an innocent lady walking the corridors of the lodge.
The lady, who was also there for an away match with her Ben 10, was seriously injured, and was rushed to the hospital. The Ben 10, who was waiting for her in the room, entered ‘grass’, disappeared, as she was being rushed to hospital while her husband was being informed of the accident.
Bo Peter was reported to the police by the husband of the injured woman, even though this husband has no idea what the wife was doing at the lodge.
We are hoping he withdraws the case in exchange for Intel that the wife was also with a Ben 10.
Bane, pray for your marriages.
Class Dismissed!
@highlight