Social Media Drama, and an Arrest That Wasn’t Quite What It Seemed
The Council of Elders from the East, known primarily for powdering bembas and restoring cultural balance, may need to add another duty to their job description: sitting down social media bully Kondwani Banda and asking him politely but firmly to use his social media platform wisely But that intervention, sadly, remains a future project.
Late one evening, just as Zambians were preparing to retire after a long day of defending the Lozi traditional attire which was caught in the crossfire of the Online Ghana vs Zambia Blouse Edition, International Mulamu dropped what many of Kondwani Banda’s alleged victims had waited years to hear: “Kondwani Banda has been arrested in Kenya.”
The internet paused. Screens refreshed. Popcorn was grabbed.
Adding fuel to the fire, Cameron-American Sir Gerald quickly assured his followers that he is very American and that his connections stretch so far they can arrest someone even when the crime, the complainant, and common sense are in different countries. He implied that a few strings had been pulled.
Instead of employing his alleged Navy-acquired skill of lying low before striking, Gerald immediately went on a media tour, granting interviews to leading newspapers and landing front-page headlines as if he personally ordered a midnight extraction of a Venezuelan president.
Netizens, however, were not convinced.
Questions flooded timelines:
How can Kenyan police arrest a foreign national over a complaint that wasn’t filed in Kenya?
Is Interpol now accepting screenshots and voice notes?
Hours later, Kondwani Banda himself appeared and confirmed the arrest but with a plot twist. The arrest, he said, had nothing to do with defamation or online harassment. It was simply an immigration issue: he had overstayed his welcome in the Swahili-speaking nation.
Just like that, the internet pivoted.
Attention swiftly shifted from Kondwani to Gerald’s American connections, and the impressive speed at which his story unraveled.
Zambians being Zambians, began fact-checking accents, timelines, and military claims with Olympic-level enthusiasm.
Reacting to the online heat, Gerald now the latest target of Kondwani’s alleged attacks clarified that he harbors no ill will and simply hopes that non of his followers become future victims.
In an earlier post, Gerald stated that he has chosen to focus on his small but growing family, rather than engage in online battles that are “obviously not healthy” for him, his business, or his household peace.