Drama Ku Intercity, Juju Fixes Thief to Ukwa Bag!
It was vibes and insha! at Intercity Bus Terminus yesterday when a thief got a heavy dose of instant karma after attempting to steal a woman’s ukwa bag. What seemed like a quick grab turned into a nightmare for the poor thief, who ended up starring in his own version of a the red bag movie.
The man, clearly thinking he had hit the jackpot, snatched the ukwa bag and tried to make his escape. But what he didn’t know was that this bag came with spiritual Wi-Fi!
Eyewitnesses described how the thief tried to escape, only to find himself stuck at Intercity. “Alepita kuno, alebuuka uko, but every time he came back mu station like GPS yalefwaya mu Intercity!” said one vendor, laughing uncontrollably.
To make matters worse, the bag was glued to his hands, no matter how much he tried to shake it off. “Nangu alangile—nothing! The bag said, ‘Takwaba ukulwa na juju!’” another witness added.
As the crowd grew, so did the thief’s frustration. He was sweating buckets, pacing around like a lost chicken. Finally, in total defeat, he approached the owner of the bag, who was calmly watching the drama unfold.
“Nshakafye, mayo. Twapapata! Release me, naiwe!” he cried, kneeling before her. The woman, cool as ice, simply responded, “Ulibe nzelu. Why take what’s not yours?”
By now, Intercity was in full chaos. Some people were rolling on the floor laughing, while others started cheering for the bag’s victory. “Uyu akose bwino! Juju 1, thief 0!” shouted one conductor. Another added, “Ama bag nomba yaliba na password!”
Vendors paused their business to witness the spectacle, with some even calling for popcorn sellers to come closer. “Ni free show, guys! Just sit and watch how juju works!”
Eventually, the woman forgave the thief and “released” him from the bag’s supernatural grip. As he stumbled away, clearly shaken, the crowd shouted, “Tizibako! Lesa ni malyotola!”
Social media has since been buzzing with the story, with many calling for more people to secure their belongings with “Intercity-approved juju.” One commenter joked, “Ba CCTV bali expensive. Just call ba juju mwapwa!”
This hilarious drama is a reminder to thieves everywhere: Don’t touch what doesn’t belong to you—especially ku Intercity!
KUMWESU DEC 23, 2024