HOW WE AVOIDED OUR WEDDING MESSING OUR LIFE
By Daniel Ngombo Kabani
One of the things that gets young couples into great debt is a wedding. My fiance and I were faced with a wedding and we asked ourselves what we should do. We agreed we will not get into debt because of a wedding. We can get in debt for business but not a wedding so we decided our wedding would cost us a k43,000. When we presented this to our committee they were shocked and asked us to justify it so we got a spreadsheet we had prepared and gave everyone a copy. The committee said it made sense but they however decided they would top up a k5000 contingency for which we were grateful.
Our strategy was to do a number of things in a non traditional way to minimize expenditure. Here are a few of them;
1. I used one suit for both church and reception.
2. My wife had one wedding dress used both at church and reception.
3. We had no cake at our wedding as we both agreed that it was an unnecessary expense and surprisingly people did not notice it. However there is nothing wrong with having a beautiful cake if you can afford it and if it means alot to you? Remember it is your day.
4. We combined the kitchen party with the reception at the same venue and this meant killing two financial birds with one stone. The reception began then the men left the women to proceed with the kitchen party.
5. We talked to one of my good hearted, loving and supportive aunts, auntie Harriet who gave us her beautiful green and spacious yard to be used as a venue for reception for free, hence no cost on venue.
6. Talked to my good friends who gave us their cars and hence had no cost booking any cars. Thanks to these supportive guys.
7. We used a beautiful play pack for pictures and it cost us less than a k500 to book as the honor was impressed about how we were thinking as a young couple.
8. We printed very simple cards on plain papers on which we spent less than a k300. We had actually almost used emails only when we realised some people were not digitally exposed.
9. I almost used my old but good shoes but my wife was against the idea so I went and bought a good pair at the COMESA market at k280. They looked like they were going at k2500 as everyone asked me where I found the powerful shoes.
10. We also did not immediately shift from my house to another because relocating during or immediately after a wedding is one of the things that comes as a serious expense for most young couples. Actually my wife and I only relocated a year into our marriage. Now if you can afford it there is nothing wrong with relocating but if you can’t, don’t get in debt to impress people with a house that is not yours.
Good planning and the support of good friends and family gave us a classy but low expense wedding that left us in no debt. This also allowed us to have a quality honeymoon as I took my wife out of the country for some time but also we could afford to buy a second car exactly 30 days after the wedding cash without a getting a loan.
There are no standard rules to what a wedding should be or how much you should spend. Almost nothing is wrong or right about how much you spend but I thought I could share my experience just in case there is a young couple undergoing pressure.
The challenge of weddings beyond means is that they leave a stressed young couple who are bitter about those who did not support them. Yet it’s a rule of life that your happiness can not be sponsored by another. Wedding beyond means leaving family and friends who feel exploited through forced contributions and this has often left shaken friendships.
Dear young couple, let not your hearts be troubled. No one has ever managed to impress society with a wedding so don’t kill yourself or your happiness. Let not a wedding get you in debt or collapse your business. Do what you can afford.
Funny thing is our wedding went viral and people praised it for simplicity and beauty. DNK
