By Thabo Kawana
I have seen the frenzy in the media over our decision to go our separate ways with my partner, its doing rounds on social media after a seemingly dedicated search conducted at the High Court registry yesterday.
My phone too won’t stop ringing as countless people keep calling and sending messages espousing different emotions. Different in that words of encouragement coming from those in the know and shock from the many who knew nothing at all.
Ordinarily, such matters are private and personal and one needs not comment publicly but unfortunately, among the ramifications that come with public life and/office is that one loses their private life completely.
My only request to us all is that in this public ridicule, insults, aspersions and formed opinions, let them all be directed at me, I am the public figure. Let’s leave my partner and children out of this because they are private individuals whom I have endeavored to protect and not involve in my public life.
Yes it’s true, my partner and I have mutually decided to go our separate ways after realizing that our union was not working. We have stayed apart for over three years and as you may be aware, divorce is a final stop after several other interventions to retrieve the union prove futile. That is why at this stage, our differences are dubbed “iretrieveble”.
Many are asking me why, what happened? My answer is that we have decided to keep the reasons private and hoping pipo can respect our decision.
Others are asking is it because of your new job? The decision to go our separate ways was arrived at three years ago, way before my appointment. It’s sad that pipo think it’s because of my three months old appointment. The two are completely unrelated.
We as a people have seen couples where because it didn’t work and they tried to force themselves on each other and in the end, death has been recorded in such unions with one partner ending in the grave whilst the other ends up locked up for life if not sentenced to death. Ramifications? Children remain orphaned and suffering.
Again here, the public says “why didn’t they just divorce instead of killing”?
For us we chose to mutually separate, remain friends and co-parent our children hoping to give them the best of both worlds as parents alive than dead and incarcerated.
What we have before Court is a consent judgement, where two consenting adults have mutually agreed to go their separate ways in a peaceful, respectful and civil manner void of conflict, drama and GBV.
My appeal to both young and old couples is that divorce is never a good thing and/experience, where you can resolve matters, please do. Where you can’t, try again .
My prayer is that no other family goes through divorce because in divorce, nobody wins.
Please don’t and never resort to violence or killing. Life does and will always go on.
Kalemba