Theologian Jpc Ntuntu What is Your Take on the STATEMENT BY REV Godfridah Sumaili THAT AVOID DEMONIC SEXUAL STYLES IN MARRIAGE?
I must state that I was reluctant to comment on this matter before I read the full article. Now that I have read the article here is my one cent on the matter
1. Rev Sumaili was quoted out ofcontext. The Flashing Headline was meant to attract wider readership and greater attention.
2. The interviewer asked her a question in relation to what people are watching on social media and obviously the internet. Honourable Sumaili in her tone discouraged couples from copying things from the internet and introducing them in their marriages. She actually emphasized that Couples must Exercise Mutual Respect for Each Other when it comes to sex.
3. Part of the content included her asking self searching questions like “Are you comfortable with it?” “The thing is that you have, a relationship, your husband, your wife, you have to feel comfortable,” she said. She added: “Be comfortable, there has to be dignity in everything you are doing. You respect your husband, you respect your wife as a human being.”
4. While there may be sexual styles she considers “demonic” based on her personal religious convictions – she advised that couples learn from the rich Zambian Culture, Uphold Christian Values and Maintain Mutual Respect in their enjoyment of their God given conjugal rights.
MY CONCLUSION BASED ON SCRIPTURE:
The Bible maintains a strong teaching for the Sanctity and Purity of the Marriage giving a stern warning that God will punish the sexually immoral and the adulterers ( Hebrews 13 vs 4).
However, the BIBLE DOES NOT GIVE ANY SINGLE PRESCRIPTION on how married couples should have sex. The Bible doesn’t discuss sexual positions or styles. The silence on the matter in the Bible is very loud. The Bible only encourages married people to maintain regular sexual intimacy with each other meeting each other’s emotional and sexual needs so that they are not tempted by Satan to seek sex or affection elsewhere (1 Corinthians 7 vs 3 – 5, Proverbs 5 vs 15 – 20).
Even the popular Missionary Style is not Prescribed in the Bible. God has given couples the freewill to decide what is best for themselves when it comes to Love Making in Marriage. The decision is yours, the choice is yours. As long as you are making love to your wife or your husband, how you do it is entirely up to the two of you. Only ensure that both of you are comfortable with the styles you choose to explore in your marriage.
WHAT TO AVOID
1. Avoid Pornography. Pornography is a home wrecker. It will destroy your marriage. If you are struggling with pornography hit my inbox. We can work together on the steps to healing.
2. Avoid forcing your wife or husband to engage in sexual styles and acts they are not comfortable with. Discuss the sexual adventures you fancy and reach mutual agreement. The primary goal in love making must be to satisfy your spouse and not yourself. It is only when we focus on the happiness of our spouse that we achieve true joy and become truly one flesh.
3. Avoid Protests and Keeping Grudges. Talk issues through and ensure that you reach peaceful resolution so that you get back to marital intimacy quickly. Protests are a recipe for infidelity. Soon you begin looking for affection or sex outside marriage.
4. Avoid Taking Each Other for Granted. Never assume that “My Wife/Husband Can’t Commit Adultery.” The truth is that we can all committ adultery, both male and female. No person regardless of their status is fully immune from falling into sexual sin. Couples must be ALWAYS be there for each other in order to prevent their marriage bed from being defiled.
IF YOUR MARRIAGE BED IS ALREADY DEFILED, REMEMBER THAT THE BLOOD OF JESUS IS AVAILABLE IN ABUDANCE TO CLEAN IT AND PURIFY IT.
JPC NTUNTU